Fifty years ago I went up to university in Cambridge. I went as a naive student who thought a career in academia beckoned. I left having discovered there were really bright people in the world and I wasn't one of them. And also having discovered I didn't know then how to discipline myself to get up in the mornings to get to lectures! And thinking I would never go back.

But Trinity College bless them organised a special 50th celebration for those of us who matriculated in 1974. I had to go, to see where I studied and stayed once again, for Virginia to see those sacred halls of learning. It was a memorable experience, most pleasant for those who had established lasting friendships since those days. For Virginia and I there were long gaps between the rounds of drinks and speeches. We skived off before the bitter end. It was essential to go, but the time dragged.

Trinity College kindly provided parking on paddocks the other side of the Cam behind the college. They own a lot of land in Cambridge and around, they are the richest college. We walked over the grass across the bridge into the college as punters punted below in the bright sun. We were directed to the first location, downstairs in the Master's Lodge, for tea and coffee (well we had apple juice). About 70 of us old students had come. We could admire the wood panelling, and I could pick out myself in a group picture from 1974. I had much more hair then! We got a welcome pack and sticky name badges which for me keep peeling off.

Trinity College looks very much as I remember it. It must be difficult to make changes yet keep that look. There was scaffolding around the dining hall. There was a snug fitting device to help wheelchair users. The college now has Wi-Fi available.

Next location was upstairs for College dignitaries to extol the college, changes planned, and not too blatantly ask for donations. Many educational establishments value alumni generosity. A recent gold medallist popped her head to show the college has sporting successes too. The pictures on the wall reminded me of being in a stately home.

Another long gap during which we saw Angel Court where I roomed in my first and third years, then Choral Evensong in the very ornate Chapel. I had never been in there before! A very ornate service too, well performed and played by surpliced choir and celebrants. But a very Church of England service by the book. I wasn't sure where East was at the point we had to face East and say the Apostles' Creed.

Another long gap with more drinks. The freelance photographer did his best to take pictures of us all, he was touting serious camera gear. And then at last suppertime! Gongs were beaten, there were name cards to indicate where we were seated, each place had six glasses for various liquid substances (port and claret must go into different glasses). We had to wait to sit down until the Master (who was a she) sat down.

At intervals an army of waiters emerged to bring plates or retrieve plates, and to serve drinks. There was ham hock and Beef Wellington and a 50th celebration dessert in between rounds of alcohol. The guy next to me did card tricks to amuse his friends along the table. The guy opposite was a psychologist (most students seemed to be mathematicians like me) who told me Bela Bollobas who interviewed me so long ago was still alive.

Eventually someone said something about "Benny Benny". The choir sang the National Anthem and we stood. It was all well done and served, but we had had enough. So before the cheese and coffee arrived so we scarpered. Virginia's feet felt like flat soles might have been better, high-heeled shoes and cobblestones don't go together. As we returned in the dark I was grateful that smart phones can act as torches.